Whatever it Takes
by Lolee Ann
Summary: A Dave and Kurt Love Story.
1. Chapter 1

_I could stay awake, just to hear you breathing _

_Watch you smile while you are sleeping_

_While you're far away and dreaming_

_I could spend forever, in this sweet surrender_

_I could stay lost in this moment forever. _

The Aerosmith ballad, which had started out low and dreamy, steadily increased in volume and was now blaring in Dave Karofsky's ear.

A bleary hazel eye peered out from under the pillow, Damn. It was 6:30 am.

Time to get up for school.

Time to spend another day pretending, laughing at jokes that weren't funny, winking at giggling girls he didn't care about, sitting through classes he wasn't engaged in. Telling fag jokes with his teammates, maybe slushing the Glee losers.

He hated all of it. Every day was painfully the same and Dave felt suffocated most of the time, like the walls were closing in around him. Even football and hockey held no appeal for him anymore.

There was only one time during the day he was anything close to happy. Well..not happy exactly, but close to feeling _something_.

That time was now, right after he woke up. In the fifteen minutes between his alarm going off and his hitting the shower.

These fifteen minutes were; Dave acknowledged in some hidden part of his soul, the only thing keeping him sane.

Dave had his own room in the big suburban Lima house his parents had bought 5 years ago. He had a big bed, a flat screen, his own lap top, a bathroom, and a lock to keep his siblings out.

For the first time in 5 years, he was using that lock.

He hadn't bothered with the lock before because he knew that his dad didn't care if he watched porn, or snuck a drink up to his room. His dad had joked with him about it, slapping him on the back, saying "like father, like son" and "that's my boy". His mother had shaken her head in that way that moms do, when they pretend to be mad. Then she had shrugged and sighed, a smile lurking on her lips, "boys will be boys, I guess". Not that they hadn't lectured him on being responsible and everything. They were good parents, they loved him. They just didn't know him.

Dave was the oldest and his mom told him everyday how proud of him she was. He was pretty sure she wouldn't be proud if she knew about this daily ritual.

His dad wouldn't slap him on the back or high five him if he knew what he had been doing every morning since 'it' happened.

"It" being THE KISS.

Dave had kissed 7 different girls since that horrible, wonderful, terrifying day in the locker room with Kurt. 3 cheerios, 2 girls at the club his cousin had snuck him into, his sister's 18 year old math tutor, and his mom's coworker, who had gotten a little too drunk at his parents last house party and planted a big wet one on him, laughingly telling his mom "your baby is all grown up".

He's barely controlled his gag reflect on that last one. To be honest, he'd barely controlled his gag reflex on all of them.

Because they weren't the lips he wanted to be kissing.

7 girls later, and when he closed his eyes, he could still taste Kurt's peppermint lip balm on his mouth. Feel the pressure of his lips, as he had, for the briefest flash of a second, kissed Dave back. And even though Kurt had rejected him, and left McKinley, and even though so much had passed between them in the interm, Dave couldn't let go of that kiss.

It was all he knew of heaven.

Which brought his mind back around to his secret morning habit.

Inhaling deeply, and with a furtive look around, Dave reached into his nightstand, grabbing his journal. Which he never wrote in. Not one single word.

His journal was one of his most treasured possessions. Not because of what it said, but because of what it hid. Exactly in the middle of its crisp pages was his picture of Kurt Hummel.

Dave hadn't taken a picture of him or anything. He might be ga..Umm…different, but he wasn't some kind of pervert stalker or anything.

He'd actually stolen it off some dumb Glee Club bulletin board.

Later he'd heard some of the Glee kids angrily discussing who had 'vandalized' their bulletin board. (He'd had to mess up some of the other pictures, so it wouldn't be noticed that Kurt's was the only one gone) He had run his fingers over the neatly folded picture in his pocket, and smiled.

Dave stared down at the picture now.

Kurt's beaming smile looked back at him. A smile; Dave painfully acknowledged, that he had never once directed at the jock in real life.

The picture showed the smaller boy in his typical style of dress. Dave had come to think of it as half male model, half grandma.

He was wearing black leggings, a hip length pale lavender sweater, shiny black boots, and a scarf. His bright blue eyes twinkled with some hidden merriment, his cheeks were flushed with their usual rosy glow, his styled hair was neatly in place, and he looked happy and at peace.

David had never seen anything more beautiful.

So this morning, like the last countless mornings before it, Dave gave in to feelings he couldn't, or at least, wouldn't, let himself think about or understand.

Grabbing his iPod from the alarm clock dock, he snapped on the headphones, and returned to his bed. Climbing under the disheveled covers he pulled his pillow towards himself and wrapped his brawny arms around it. It smelled like peppermint. Another theft on his part. His sister never had found out who'd stolen her peppermint body spray. Dave smiled grimly. He doubted he was high on the list of suspects. Sighing quietly and pulling his body as close to the fetal position as his oversized limbs would allow, he switched the Aerosmith song back to the beginning, hugged the pillow to his body, lay the picture on the pillow next to his head, and..In the softest of whispers, he sang.

Only in his heart did he acknowledge to whom he was singing.

His beloved.

And though it shamed him to the soles of his feet, and he would deny it to his last breath, he began to cry. His voice breaking on the line of "I'd still miss you, babe", his hand stroked the picture and clenched it tight to his heart, as he gave in to mixed feelings of pain, despair, and longing.


	2. Chapter 2

Karofsky was late to school. Just what he needed. Another detention after school today for being tardy. Coach Beiste was already on his case, and now he was going to be late to practice.

Cursing Figgins and his stupid rules under his breath, he made his way down the empty corridors of McKinley High.

Above the sound of his Nikes slapping against the linoleum floor, he heard snatches of lessons and conversations from behind each door.

" y otra vez, "buenas dias mi amiga"

"no..I told her not to sleep with him! I know,girl..oh god, he's going to get the projector. This class blows"

"Historians agree that it was the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand."

"I know, pink is the new black. I've been saying it for years!"

Dave's mind went completely blank and his feet slammed to an immediate halt. He must be hearing things.

"Fur is never out of season, trust me"

Heart thudding in his chest, hands shaking, Dave stumbled forward the two steps necessary to peer into the classroom where he could hear _his_ voice.

Oh God.

It was that black girl..what was her name? Porsha? And that Goth Asian girl. And in between them.._him._

Emotions hit Dave from all sides. Fear, confusion, panic, anger. Piercing through all of them was a sweet, sharp feeling of joy. A feeling like he could breathe again. Like everything had color again.

Kurt was back at McKinley.

The intensity of the feeling took his breath away and before he could step back, he moaned in relief and surprise.

Such a tiny sound.

Enough to bring bright blue eyes up. Enough to lock those eyes to his. Enough to destroy that swelling of joy as those beloved eyes, the same ones he stared at, sang to, dreamed of filled with terror and hatred.

Unsure of what to do, wanting to turn in every direction at once, Dave did the only thing he could think to do.

He ran.

10 minutes later he found himself under the bleachers. Though it was winter, the bleachers protected this area and it was; if not warm, at least protected from the icy chill of the day.

Collapsing to the ground, Dave bowed his head in his hands and did the only thing he had been taught to do when in a state of crisis.

He prayed.

_Oh God, please let me know what to do. Please let me hold it all in. Please stop me from shaking Oh God, please make it stop hurting. Make it ok that he hates me. _

The irony was not lost on Dave. Here he was, the bully, praying for strength and deliverance from his favorite victim.

For the first time in his life, Dave understood what people meant when they said "karma is a bitch".

So absorbed was he in his struggle for control that he failed to hear the sound of soft footsteps approaching. Dave almost didn't see him until he was standing right above him.

Kurt Hummel had followed him out to under the bleachers.

In Dave's most shameful fantasies, the ones he would not acknowledge to himself, he and Kurt had met under the bleachers before.

In those hot and hurried dreams, Kurt forgave Dave, hugged him, kissed him, ran his hands all over..

Don't think about it, Karofsky snarled to himself. Struggling to maintain a calm demeanor, Dave asked the first thing that popped to his mind,

"What are you doing here?"

Kurt snuggled further into his fur lined trench coat and sighed. Dramatically.

"Listen Karofsky, Mercedes told me that you haven't been slushing the Glee kids and you seem to have calmed down. I am back at McKinley now and I'm not leaving. So, I think we should start as we mean to go and settle this thing between us"

Dave listened to the rushed speech, hearing the edge of nerves in the smaller boy's words.

He was putting a brave face, but he was still scared.

No matter what happened, no matter what the future held for them, separate or together, Dave couldn't let his Kurt live with that fear any longer.

Raising solemn hazel eyes to the boy standing over him, he stated

"I will never hurt you again. I swear on my grand mom's grave".

Dave winced..what was he 5? Swearing on his Grandmom's grave.

Kurt seemed reassured though. He had lost a little of the nervous edge to his voice when he said,

"Ok, I am going to make the decision to trust you. But this is your last chance, Karofsky"

He looked momentarily nervous, then determined…

"So, where do we go from here? Friends?" Kurt sneered the last word, as if doubting the possibility of a world in which the two of them could co exists peacefully.

Karofsky stood up, his height causing him to tower over the smaller boy.

Reaching out his large hand, he glasped the small smooth hand of his first true love in his, and he looked directly into those deep blue eyes and let the tiniest smile chase across his mouth:

"Friends"


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, this one is set; of course, at the time of Blame it on the Alcohol. I just wanted to add how I thought it could have gone down if Kurt and Dave were friends and Dave was invited to the party. Spin the Bottle, anyone? xoxo Lolee**

When Kurt Hummel agreed to be your friend, he didn't stop at half measures.

Since that fateful day under the bleachers two weeks before, Kurt had successfully gotten the Glee clubbers to forgive and befriend (albeit grudgingly) Dave, gotten Dave back on track academically after scheduling a meeting for him with Ms. Pillsbury, and single handedly convinced Dave to give up all of his polo shirts. Something about "last season" or maybe he had said "last decade."

It had been; without a doubt, the best two weeks of Dave's life. Even the harassment from the other jocks; which he had once feared so desperately, had little impact on him. Nothing was going to deter him from being friends with Kurt.

Dave was amazed at how Kurt had gone from being paralyzed by fear of him to marching him daily into the boy's bathroom for a 'recomb' and moisturizer.

Kurt couldn't have guessed that Dave was now going out of his way to come a little disheveled to school and making sure he crossed paths with the smaller boy. He couldn't have guessed because Dave wouldn't admit, even in the privacy of his own mind, what he was doing. All he knew is that he needed those five minutes in the bathroom alone with Kurt.

Kurt running his hands through Dave's hair and smoothing wrinkles out of his button down shirts was the best feeling he had ever experienced. Better than slushing that Berry girl. Better than getting a touch down. Better than the way his mom hugged him when he got a good grade. And ten times better than making out with a girl.

Every single brush of Kurt's small, cool fingers sent chills down Dave's spine. Every impatient grumbling about Dave's lack of fashion sense warmed his heart.

In those five minutes, Kurt's attention was solely focused on him. It felt like being the recipient of all the sunlight in the world. It chased away the gloom and sadness that Dave had stored in his body and mind over the last several months. Being with Kurt, even just seeing him, made him feel physically lighter.

Today, Dave could sense that something was up. Usually Kurt recombed and straightened with the efficiency of a drill sergeant. Today, however, he had been brushing the same spot on Dave's head for a solid 3 minutes.

Dave never wanted it to stop, but his concern for Kurt's distress prompted him to speak

"I think it's brushed ok now."

Kurt jumped, the comb clattering to the floor.

"Why don't you tell me what's on your mind?"

Licking his lips.._Oh god, he was licking his lips.. focus Karofsky, focus_..Kurt looked nervously up at the bigger boy.

'You wouldn't happen to want to go to Rachel Berry's Glee party this Saturday? I know it sounds lame, but I need to get out of my house. If I have to watch another episode of "Dirtiest Jobs" while my dad and Carol make out on the couch, I am going to freak out!"

Was Kurt asking him out? Dave's breath caught somewhere between his lungs and his throat and his heart raced, thudding so loudly he was surprised that Kurt didn't hear it.

Trying to cover his nerves, he reached for the comb on the floor, simultaneously muttering

"you asking me out, Hummel?" It came out as a growl, and Kurt reacted by going slightly pale and stammering:

"Umm..no, of course not! This is a glee party and Rachel said something about needing more boys for some game of celebrity she has planned"

Kurt's rushed explanation trickled to a halt and he nervously faced Dave, who had risen after finding the comb on the floor.

Dave handed him the comb and shoved his shaking hands into the back pocket of his jeans (Gap now, instead of Wal-Mart-more of Kurt's work).

"What time?"

THE PARTY

Dave had never seen a basement like Rachel Berry's. Tall ceilings, a stage, and a fully stocked bar. It definitely beat the basement at his house. Theirs was dark and stuffed with Christmas decorations, a deep freezer, and his dad's workbench.

He couldn't' recall the last time he'd felt so out of place. Sure, the Glee kids were cautiously nice to him, but he wasn't one of them.

Grimacing, he took another swig of his second wine cooler.

Great, here ten minutes and he had already hit his drink max.

Then he heard it. _His_ voice. Unable to hide his wide grin, Dave, after a quick glance around, rushed to the stairs.

Finally, this party was looking up.

Just as quickly as his jovial mood came, it was erased. Kurt was walking down the stairs. But he wasn't alone.

Time stopped. Dave felt like he'd been physically punched in the stomach . His stomach muscles tightened in response and his hand squeezed the chilled glass of his wine cooler. Dimly he heard Kurt explaining the other boy to Berry.

"..Parents are out of town…still good friends…wanted to meet you all"

Dave knew this guy. He was the one that had come to talk to him the day after the KISS.

Blaine. That was his name. He looked as put together out of his uniform as he did in it. Kurt probably never had to comb his hair or lecture him on how combat boots don't go with sweat pants.

He was a 'pretty boy', just like Kurt. His Kurt.

Karofsky didn't realize it, but he had been glaring at the duo, trapping them at the foot of the stairs with his menacing stare.

Kurt walked forward tentatively.

"Dave, this is my good friend and former classmate, Blaine- you remember him, right?

Rachel looked at the boys; Dave glaring at Blaine and Blaine glaring back, confusion evident in her expression.

"You know Blaine, Dave?"

Before Dave could muster up a reply, Kurt jumped quickly into the fray

"Oh yeah, Blaine and I saw Dave at the movies with his friends once, right Dave?"

Dave nodded in assent. He felt incapable of speech.

Dave resumed his seat on one of the small couches, watching Rachel hand Kurt and Pretty Boy their drink tickets.

A few minutes passed, and Dave began to regret his decision to come. Everyone was clearly bored. Except those making out. Dave shied away from thinking about making out, there was only one person he wanted to make out with and he was here with someone else.

God, had he really thought this party was going to change something? Had he, deep in his heart, hoped that Kurt would see him in a different light at this party?

How pathetic.

After a few more excruciating minutes of berating himself and covertly watching Hummel and Pretty boy flirting, Dave witnessed a heated discussion between Rachel and Puckerman.

A moment later, Puckerman turned up the music and declared open bar.

It only took Dave a few minutes to claim an entire bottle of whiskey.

Whiskey, according to his father, was a man's drink.

Half a bottle later, Dave found that all of his feelings of being out of place had vanished.

Suddenly, this was the best party he had ever attended.

He danced with Rachel, played quarters with Puckerman and Hudson, and, if his already fuzzy memory served correct, he had licked salt off someone's stomach. One of the blond cheerleaders, if he remembered correctly.

Dave had even managed to talk to Kurt and Blaine without a problem. Blaine was already smashed out of his mind, but Kurt wasn't drinking. He said something about wanting to impress someone.

Pretty boy, probably.

And even through the haze of alcoholic numbness, that piece of information still managed to hurt.

Dave sat down heavily on the couch. All the easiness of the night, numbed by an alcoholic fog, drained away. Now all he could feel was an overwhelming almost pulsating feeling of sadness. It washed over him like the tide washing out to shore.

Through his somber thoughts, a shriek from Rachel Berry caught his attention:

"Who wants to play spin the bottle?"

Oh God.

Now he was going to get to watch his Kurt kiss pretty boy. He'd probably rig the bottle to have it land on his friend.

Could this night get any worse?

Dave reluctantly abandoned his red cup and bottle of whiskey, and jumped into the laughing circle. His feeling of being out of place returned.

He was the biggest guy in the room and now he was uncomfortably shoved next to Puckerman and Chang. His legs crossed and head pounding, Dave sat on edge, stomach churning, waiting for the moment.

The moment he knew was inevitable. When it would be Kurt's turn or Blaine's turn to play this admittedly junior high game.

The bottle would spin and it would land on the other one. All the Glee clubbers would probably cheer and chant "kiss kiss kiss" as they were right now for the blond cheerleader and the blond kid who was dating that Santana girl. They'd be just as excited for Kurt and Pretty Boy.

They knew that Kurt deserved better than him.

Heck, none of them even knew about THE KISS.

He was sure they'd be grossed out if they did.

Finally, after a three spins, it was Kurt's turn. Dave wondered how he would ensure that it landed on Blaine.

Round and round and round the empty wine cooler spun. Dave found himself holding his breath as it spun slower and slower and finally stopped.

On him.


	4. Chapter 4

Absolute Silence.

For one desperate moment Dave thought that he was losing his hearing, but; judging by the stricken expressions on everyone's face, he hadn't.

For the first time in his life, Dave felt like he understood the phrase "you could have heard a pin drop."

A nervous titter broke the silence. It was Berry, past tipsy, now fully drunk,

"Well, are you two gonna get your kiss on or what? It's my turn next and I'm getting impatient!"

Stomach churning, eyes unfocused, Dave's muscles tightened, his fight or flight instinct kicked into high gear, overriding the drunken lethargy of his limbs.

He was going to run.

Crouching onto the balls of his feet he scanned the room for the quickest exit. _The stairs, you idiot_, he thought. _It's the only exit._

At that moment, in that last desperate second, his hazel gaze got caught in the deep blue eyes of his beloved.

_Kurt knew what was about to happen_. Dave realized that the smaller boy could see it in his face. Kurt, who had been humiliated countless times at the hands of Karofsky, seemed to sense that another moment of humiliation was about to occur.

Dave could see that he had tensed his lean frame and lowered his eyes, probably desperately thinking, preparing to make some off hand and deprecating remark after Dave's hasty exit.

The idea that he was going to hurt Kurt, even just his pride, after promising to never do it again was too much.

He couldn't bear to see Kurt in pain. It hurt _him_ too much.

"Well, I hate to disappoint a lady" Dave growled, letting the momentum of his crouched stance push him forward.

Grabbing Kurt by his red shirt, Dave leaned in, aware of the collective held breath of the entire Glee club.

Then, he kissed him.

On the cheek.

The room exploded with laughter and jeers.

"That's cheating!"

"No way, man, if I had to kiss Chang, you should have to kiss Kurt!"

"Lame, Karofsky"

Dave resumed his seat, lips burning from the feel of Kurt's incredibly smooth skin, vaguely aware of the laughter surrounding him, the damned bottle spinning again, and the tension slowly ebbing out of the room.

Berry's spin had landed on Finn, and everyone's attention focused on her attempts to lock him into a passionate embrace.

Amidst the chaos, Dave finally found the courage to raise his eyes. Just as he had known, the blue eyes were there, waiting to meet his, and Dave searched them for signs of relief and the camaraderie had he come to cherish over the last several weeks.

Instead, he saw the two things he had promised himself he'd never see in his Kurt's eyes again.

Fear and pain.

Anguish ripped through him like a knife. He felt his breath catch and he lowered his eyes; sure that everyone could see him for the love sick school boy that he was. You couldn't hide pain like this. He was in agony.

He's hurt Kurt by kissing him. He'd made him scared again and he'd humiliated him in front of the boy he was "trying to impress".

God, couldn't he ever do anything right?

Hudson had finally unwound Rachel's tentacles and the circle was beginning to break up.

Dave, stumbling over his large feet, took advantage of the momentary chaos to slip up the stairs and go out the front door.

He needed some fresh air and time to think.

Dave had been sitting on the bitterly cold front porch for 30 minutes when he heard the sound of faltering feet approaching. Shoving _the picture _back into his jeans pocket,he hugged his body closer to the shadows, edging away from the approaching noise.

He didn't want to have to explain why his eyes were red and swollen. Or why he couldn't seem to stop shaking despite the warm coat, hat, and scarf he'd hastily donned.

Slurred speech reached his ears and set his nerves on edge. It was Kurt. And he was drunk.

Maybe he'd already impressed that Blaine kid enough and decided to let loose, Dave thought.

_Yeah, more likely he's trying to drown out the memory of that pathetic kiss_, sneered a voice inside his head.

Wasn't it enough that he couldn't ever be with him? Now he had to hear him talking to pretty boy, probably expressing his undying love.

Or, oh God, worse..maybe they'd come out here to make out. Nausea chocked him, and he braced himself, as if for a physical blow.

"I just wanted to make him jealous, make him say something or do something. I am so freaking tired of pretending to be his best buddy"

A few disheartened sobs punctuated the garbled confession.

"I think I love him. I can't explain it. He makes me feel safe and like someone wants me and likes me exactly the way I am".

Dave's fists clenched. His worst nightmare was coming true. First he'd hurt and scared the only person he cared about (outside of family), and now he had to hear him drunkenly extol the virtues of another boy. And confess his love of Blaine to Berry or one of the other glee kids.

He'd never felt pain like this before. It went through his body like electric shocks. The shaking intensified and he felt his eyes well up again.

And yet, some part of him was angry. Angry at that dumb ass Blaine for not appreciating Kurt. Angry that Kurt, the most amazing boy he'd ever met, was out here crying over some jackass who neither appreciated, understood, nor deserved him.

The anger allowed him to shove all the feelings of pain back. Allowed him to pretend that his world wasn't crumbling around him. Anger, he understood. Anger he could work with.

Blaine was about to get some sense knocked into him.

Dave yanked the hat off of his head and prepared to rise. But the words he heard next rooted him, stricken, to the spot.

"He's a boy. And a jock, at that. He doesn't do subtle. Have you tried telling him that you like him?"

It was Blaine's voice.


	5. Chapter 5

It felt like the bottle had stopped at him all over again.

His brain went absolutely blank.

For a brief moment he wondered if he was going crazy from the whiplash of too many emotions and too much whiskey.

Maybe he had passed out and this was a dream. When Dave heard the next words, he had to conclude that he must, in fact, be dreaming.

"Just tell him? I have told him in a thousand ways! I arranged his binders in his locker by color, I baked him brownies, I wear red every day because he said it was his favorite color, and you know I look washed out in red, and.."

Red was Dave's favorite color. But Kurt couldn't be talking about him. There was no way. Only, he had baked him brownies once. Dave had eaten the entire plate in 30 minutes. Then he'd felt sick remembering Kurt's chubby comment.

He'd voluntarily run 20 extra laps in practice that night.

But it was too unbelievable to be real. Leaning out of the shadows, he listened intently to the sobbing boy, now being patted on the back consolingly by Blaine.

"And the bottle stops at him and he kisses my cheek! I was so humiliated and so scared. What if he never loves me back? What if that kiss in the locker room was nothing? What makes me so unlovable? Would it have been so bad to just kiss me?"

It finally sank in.

Kurt was talking about him. Kurt was saying that he _loved him_.

Him. David Allen Karofsky.

This beautiful, wonderful, sweet, funny, kind boy loved him.

Even though he was a closet case. Even though he was a bully. Even though he didn't know the first thing about how to show love. Even though he couldn't even say that he was…different.. in his own mind.

Even after all of that, Kurt loved him.

The under the bleachers feeling came rushing in, coursing through his veins. That sweet, sharp joy. It crowded out everything else.

Fear, worry about people's reactions, anger..it all faded and Dave felt warmed to his very soul.

Kurt was now sobbing quietly into Blaine's shoulder pads. Blaine looked at the same time sympathetic, mildly annoyed, and very cold.

Dave walked without a sound (not easy feat considering how much whiskey he'd imbibed) to the huddled pair. Tapping Blaine silently on the shoulder, he nodded his head toward the side entrance to the basement.

Blaine heaved a sigh of relief and transferred the weeping burden from his arms, to the bigger, warmer embrace of the football player. He disappeared into the basement, shivering, with a smile gracing his perfect features. He was visibly relieved and happy for his friend.

Kurt, caught up in his own feelings of despair and sadness, hadn't seemed to register the transfer of his person from one boy to the next.

Leaning into Dave's chest (which is all he reached on him); he sighed heavily and took a deep breath.

"I love the smell of old spice, when did you start wearing it? It reminds me of…"

Confusion flashed across his features. Kurt froze and slowly lifted his face to the taller boy in whose embrace he was being tenderly held.

"…Dave". The last word was both a completion of his thought and a question.

Immediately he stiffened and tried to pull out of Dave's arms.

"I'm sorry..uhh..I don't know why Blaine pulled you into this..I..the party…Rachel is probably looking for us…"

Kurt's eyes were glazed from too much alcohol and his recent tears, and his cheeks flushed with embarrassment and confusion.

He was adorable.

Pulling the shocked figure close, Dave spoke:

"I came out here to give you what I owe you"

"O..owe mme? "Kurt stumbled over the question.

"Yeah." Karofsky muttered, intent on running his hands up and down the other boy's arms.

"What? What do you owe me?'

Hazel eyes met blue. And for the third time in less than an hour, absolute silence fell.

Tilting his beloved's tear streaked face up, Dave leaned in.

"This"

And then he kissed him.

Shock jolted through both of their bodies and they parted. Time froze for what felt like a eternity and a second all at once.

And then grasping hands reached out, pulling each other close, their lips melding, breath heaving, and arms locked around each other. It was everything Dave had dreamed of. It was sweet, and honest, and so freaking hot he was weak at the knees.

It was; Dave thought in whatever dim recess of his brain hadn't shut down with sheer lust, as if he hadn't known what it meant to _feel_ until this very minute.

Every dream, every morning singing to that damn picture..he hadn't known. Those moments were nothing compared to the tidal wave of emotion swamping his whole being at this moment.

Staggering to the porch, wrapped up in each other, Dave struggled to find the padded bench he had been seated on before. Finding it beneath his searching fingers, he pulled Kurt down onto the cold cushions and followed him down.

Disengaging for a second, he cradled Kurt's head in his big, callused hands. He had to talk to him..had to tell him.. in the dim light Dave could see that Kurt's lips were swollen and red, marked by _his_ kisses.. God, it made him feel hot all over his body, and he couldn't resist placing biting little kisses on those tempting lips.

"Kurt…_oh my gosh, yes, kiss me_…Kurt, I've got to tell you" Dave struggled to emerge from the ocean of pleasure he was drowning in. All he could think, feel, and taste was Kurt's lips. He tasted like peppermint and wine.

Dave doubted he'd ever be able to smell or taste either without getting hot. He knew that he needed to say something.._just a few more kisses, oh my gosh_, Kurt's lips had moved to his neck. _Oh god, Oh god_…

Wrenching himself out of embrace, he sat up and moved to the other side of the bench. He needed distance. He could think if he had a little distance.

Inhaling deeply and trying to tear his eyes off of Kurt's adorably mussed hair, unbuttoned coat, flushed cheeks, and _god, that mouth.._

Dave closed his eyes.

"I don't know how to say things the way that you do. I don't have any pretty words….I j..just have to to tell yyyou…"

Dave realized that he was stammering. Taking a deep breath, he plunged onward

"I don't know what this means. I can't say it. I don't know if I'm…_deep breath, Karofsky_…g..ga..gay." His voice shook on that last word and he felt the tears trying to well up in his eyes. Defensively he wiped his eyes and continued, ignoring Kurt's muffled gasp.

"All I know are two things. One is that I'm not ready to tell the world about us. I know that sucks and it makes me a coward, I know that. The other thing that I know is..I love you. God, I love you so much"

Dave thought that confessing his love for another boy would crush him.

It actually had the opposite effect.

Confessing his love for Kurt had set him free.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey everyone! Thanks for all of your kind words and reviews. Reviews; as I always say, are like crack to me. This next chapter is what happens after Karofsky tells Kurt that he loves him at the Berry "blame it on the alcohol" party. I hope you like it! I would love to hear your thoughts! **

"_You make me sick, Karofsky! You don't know what love is and I don't ever want to see you again!"_

"_No! Please, let me explain..Please, don't go..." Dave was running, racing faster than he ever had, off the porch and down Berry's long driveway. Heart pounding, breath heaving, he stepped onto the road and the street fell out from under his feet. Unable to balance, he felt himself falling_.

Dave jerked awake, bathed in a cold sweat; body braced for the impending fall his brain signaled was coming.

Sigh.

_Oh thank God. _He had been dreaming. And it had been _that dream_ again. The one where Kurt rejected him and told him he'd never see him again.

On that freezing night 6 weeks ago, the night of the Glee drinking party, he'd waited for the rejection he was sure was Kurt would voice. The rejection he still dreamed about.

It had never come.

No sooner had the words "I love you" crossed his lips then a sobbing Kurt had flung himself across the bench and wrapped his young, strong arms around the jock.

It had floored Dave to see the other boy so incoherent and emotional. He was used to seeing Kurt in pristine control of both his appearance and his emotions.

His declaration of love seemed to have snapped that control and stripped away all of the icy disdain and flippancy.

Kurt wasn't trying to protect himself anymore.

"I love you so much, David. I love your smile, and your beautiful eyes, and the way you smell, and how big you are. You make me feel so safe. I love how you laugh and how smart you are, even though you try to hide it" The breathless words poured from the smaller boy, punctuated by trembling kisses. He seemed determined to leave no inch of Dave's face or neck unmarked.

Minutes later, the long night of excessive drinking and emotional highs and lows began to take its toll on the entwined couple. Feeling his Kurt shivering (from the cold this time) Karofsky picked him up carried him inside (over the threshold! Even exhausted and still slightly drunk, Kurt had reveled in the romance of the gesture)

Finding a roaring fire in the Berry's large living room, Dave had settled the two of them on some cushions in front of the blaze, and pulled a quilt from the couch to cover them.

They'd fallen asleep wrapped in each others arms.

Of course, nothing so perfect could last forever. They'd been rudely awakened by the members of the Glee club the next morning. (Apparently everyone had been too drunk to go home) They'd been singing…_singing _for the love of all that is holy.

"Secret lovers, yeah that's what we are  
Trying so hard to hide the way we feel"

Dave had braced himself, emerging from the haze of his hangover, head pounding, ready to do battle.

Kurt, still snuggled in Dave's tense arms, had run his hands soothingly over the larger boy's hair, and mustered his prissiest voice for a quick and effective rebuttal: 

"Shut up and go away"

Amidst a head splitting chorus of hooting and salacious comments, the Glee Club had taken their leave.

In those lingering moments in front of the fire, with the light of day slowly stripping away their safe cocoon, Dave and Kurt had talked.

Talked about Dave's inability to "come out".

Kurt had agreed to keep things secret..for now.

Talked about what they were to each other.

Both had agreed the term "boyfriends" had a nice ring to it.

Talked about "the rules".

Friends, good friends even, at school and Dave's house.

At Kurt's house, and with the Glee club, they wouldn't hide anything.

Dave would join the Glee Club so that they could spend more time together.

Kurt would attend Dave's games to cheer him on.

It's wasn't perfect. But it was a start.

The pure sweet tones of Natalie Wood singing "Somewhere" from West Side story pierced Dave's thoughts. Kurt had changed all of his ring tones to Broadway songs weeks ago. He'd almost died of embarrassment when his dad asked him why his phone was blaring "I feel pretty" one night when Kurt had called him at dinner time.

But "Somewhere" was his text alert. He reached for his phone.

A text from Kurt.

"Good morning, my little cinnamon scented slice of new york cheese cake. What are you wearing today? (Do not use the words 'sweat pants' in your response or this relationship is over!)"

Holding the phone over his shaking chest, Dave laughed silently. _Cinnamon scented slice of new york cheesecake_?

During the first week that they had been dating, Kurt had discovered Dave's hatred of pet names. From that moment on, he had perversely sought every opportunity to apply a series of steadily more and more ridiculous pet names to his boyfriend.

Last week, he had even sung to him in Glee Club, standing before the entire club announcing "This one is for my snookie wookie bear".

He'd then proceeded to sing a very Broadway version of "Sugar Pie Honey Bunch" while Dave hid his red face, good naturedly enduring the laughter and jokes of his fellow glee clubbers.

He'd enacted his revenge that night at Kurt's house. He'd replaced his copy of "Singing in the Rain" with Rambo III.

Kurt had plastered himself to Dave throughout the whole movie, hiding his face in Dave's chest, and shrieking every time he heard gun fire.

Dave didn't know when he'd enjoyed an action movie more.

And even though he was made to watch every Lisa Minnelli movie ever made the following week, it had still been worth it.

Shaking his head, Dave flipped open his phone and replied:

"Hey babe, I was thinking the gray corduroy pants and pale blue button down with dark blue t shirt underneath. And my gray sneakers.

Clicking send, Dave shook his head again. He couldn't believe everything he'd learned about clothing in the last six weeks. He remembered that first Monday after the Glee party, when he'd gotten a text from Kurt asking him what he was wearing.

He'd replied "clothes."

Two days of no kissing and at least 3 hours of lectures on the dangers of the cotton poly blend had convinced Dave that it was better to just be specific.

His text alert sounded.

"I love a man in corduroy! Don't forget to moisturize! And please, your brown loafers. I don't care what Football Quarterly says, sneakers do not go with everything!"

Karofsky flipped his phone shut and sprinted for the shower. If he got ready fast, he could see Kurt in as little as an hour and a half.


	7. Chapter 7

**This is kind of a transition chapter, and there is A LOT more to come in the final two chapters. If it gets a good reception, I might do the whole story from Kurt's perspective. Thanks for your reviews, favorites, etc. You people inspire me!**

In the weeks leading up to their regional competition, Dave and Kurt were inseparable.

Aside from the few hours at school, they dedicated every waking moment to their new relationship. To getting to know each other. To listening to each other's music. To debating politics, coffee flavors, and who was the best Batman. (Dave was old school and favored Michael Keating, while Kurt was firmly on Team Christian Bale.)

Dave spent hours talking to Kurt's dad about sports and mechanics, while Kurt spent hours with Dave's mom, talking about interior design and why men had such a hard time talking about their feelings

They ate dinner at each others houses; sitting close together at Kurt's house, and across the table at Dave's. Movies and snuggling on the couch at Kurt's, video games and studying at Dave's. They didn't care what they were doing. As long as they were together.

They had even made some progress with Dave's family. His parents; much to Dave's surprise, loved Kurt. Especially his mom.

Kurt had enlisted Dave's mom as an ally in going through and transforming Dave's wardrobe. She had been delighted when Kurt first approached her about the topic as she had been nagging Dave for years to "sharpen up". _Whatever that meant_. He'd never forget that day he came home from helping Kurt's dad replace axels on a vintage Ford and he'd found the two of them; his mom and Kurt, sitting together in his walk in closet with a large garbage bag filled with all of his _favorite _clothes. His sweats, his worn in jeans, his old comfy sneakers.

All of it gone.

Not only had his boyfriend and his mom been ravishing his wardrobe, they had been flipping through his baby book, cooing and laughing over the images of his toddler self.

The wave of sadness that had gone through him at the loss of his favorite grungy clothes had disappeared, replaced by the welling of bittersweet tears at the sight of the two of them, bonding over his baby book. The urge to tell his mom the truth hit him so hard in that moment. He wanted to be able to join them in their little closet party, to spread out on the floor; now empty of all of his old sneakers, and rest his head on Kurt's lap, laughing along with them.

Fists clenching, he had muttered something off hand and joking about losing all of his favorite clothes and walked away. It had taken him 30 minutes to will away the tears and be able to act "normal". _Whatever the hell that was_.

Dave didn't know anymore. He was constantly at sixes and sevens. He felt such a wide spectrum of emotions. Every day with Kurt was an emotional roller coaster.

Dave had been surprised that; after spending so much of their time together, they hadn't grown bored or tired of each other. Kurt had laughingly told him that those things were for later in the relationship, stating that; right now, they still in their "honeymoon phase".

Dave had swallowed hard at hearing the words honeymoon come out of Kurt's mouth. A honeymoon with Kurt would be.._no, Karofsky, no. Don't even go there_. He tried hard to NOT think about Kurt in..that way. But he still ended up thinking about it at least a few minutes a day..ok, fine, he thought about it ALL THE TIME.

Not that they had taken the next step in their relationship. They both agreed that they weren't ready for that. But that hadn't stopped them from sleeping together. Literally sleeping, of course. Which had required logistical genius the likes of which he had never seen before. The entire Glee club had participated, between moving Kurt's car (thank you Finn), to claiming Kurt was sleeping at their house (thank you Rachel and Mercedes), to sneaking him in and out of the house. (thank you Puckerman and Chang for dropping by to eat his mom's waffles, talk about football, and mention "bringing" Kurt with them)

It was a total circus.

It's just that Dave had never felt anything better than falling asleep with Kurt in his arms. So, on several occasions (8 to be precise) he had convinced Kurt to stay the night at his house.

It had been all of heaven and quite a bit of hell as well.

Waking wrapped up in the arms of his beloved had given Dave a peace he had never known.

But waking up with Kurt had also tested his control in ways he had never experienced. Good morning kisses had led to good morning caresses, which had led to good morning..

Dave had taken so many cold showers lately that he'd begun to turn the cold knob on as a matter of habit.

But he wouldn't trade it for the world.

He and Kurt had gone ice skating.

They'd gone bowling.

They'd gone to the theatre, taking advantage of the dark to lock their hands together.

They had gone on long walks and laid in each others arms out under the star strewn sky.

Kurt had said that he felt a little bit like Bella and Edward in that moment. Dave hadn't been able to rouse himself from his happy reverie to ask who the hell where Bella and Edward.

In those moments together, they both opened up to each other as they never had to another living person.

They'd talked about their dreams, their plans, and their future.

Kurt had talked about the gaping hole that the death of his mother had left in his life.

Dave had talked about the pain of trying to live up to his fathers expectations.

Through every moment, Kurt had been there, documenting the moments with his iPhone. He took pictures of everything .Of the two them kissing. Of their first "date" (if burgers and a movie at Kurt's house could be called a date). Of their walks in the country, of their nights lying under the stars. And drowsily, of them falling asleep together in Dave's big bed.

He told Dave that he wanted something that he could show their grandchildren.

Dave had laughed and added his copies of the pictures to his journal. Instead of the one lone picture, he now had many pictures.

Pictures of the happiest days of his life.

He'd even told Kurt about his sad little ritual (singing to his picture). Kurt had surprised him by tearing up and insisting that he sing to him in person.

Something about singing "I don't want to miss a thing" to Kurt, his head lying on the pillow next to him, had been healing to Dave.


	8. Chapter 8

**This was the hardest chapter for me to write. I kept trying to talk my way around it, but its part of the story and it demanded to be written. One chapter remains after this one and I will finish this story today. Thanks for all of our reviews, favorites, etc. They thrill me each and every time! **

Dave had one foot in heaven, one foot in hell.

Stretched out along the back row of the bus to regionals, his arms wrapped around a sleeping Kurt – that was the heaven part.

Listening to Berry discuss her emotional connection to some movie or something called Wicked was the hell part. She'd be yapping at the speed of sound for over 30 minutes, with no end in sight.

Feeling the smaller boy start to stir, Dave sent up a silent prayer of thanks. Kurt always knew how to put Berry in her place. All he was capable of was listening with strained politeness, while his fingers tingled, wishing for a large cup of slushie.

Shaking himself awake, cheeks flushed, and hair ever so slightly mussed, Kurt fixed Berry with what Dave privately thought of as his "diva glare".

"Rachel! You know Dave's a Broadway virgin. It's too much! Go back to watching Finn sleeping. I've seen it, it's fascinating. He drools"

With a muffled exclamation of outrage, the brunette swung around in her seat. 30 seconds passed before Dave saw her reach over and tap Chang on the shoulder, asking "How many times did you see Cats before it left Broadway?"

Laughing together, Kurt fell back into Dave's arms.

Sigh. Now it was 100% heaven. Dave felt enveloped by the now familiar sense of peace that being with Kurt had brought to his life.

"So, nervous about your solo?"

Kurt had been awarded the team's only solo, after a serious showdown with Rachel Berry. He was going to be singing Jeff Buckley's version of "Hallelujah" and Dave knew that he was both supremely excited and scared out of his mind. Dave was scared for him. He hated even being in the back, harmonizing. He thought he'd probably rather die than sing a solo. But his boyfriend was, he was finding, braver than him in a lot of ways.

Kurt shook his head slowly, pulling Dave's arms closer around his slender frame.

"You know how nervous I've been? I haven't been able to shake it, but today, it came to me. A way to overcome my nerves, and I've been fine and just excited to sing since that moment"

Dave's brow furrowed.

"Oh, so what are going to do? Imagine the audience naked? You know my parents and some football guys are going to be out there. Just be warned"

Kurt laughed silently, his chest shaking beneath Dave's big arms.

"No, you idiot! Although, there are certain football players I wouldn't mind..."

A warning growl from Dave cut off the rest of that speech.

Laughing even more merrily, Kurt broke out of Dave's embrace, turning to face him.

Bending his head, the smaller boy muttered something.

"What?"

"I'll tell you if you promise not to laugh, David Allen Karofsky!"

Dave reached over and grabbed his boyfriend's hand. He always felt better when they were touching. It centered him somehow.

"Babe, its ok. You know that I won't laugh. Not after the beauty night incident"

Dave smiled in memory of that particular night. Kurt; after watching every single Die Hard had declared that that the next 'date night' was his to plan. Dave had happily conceded. He was on a Bruce Willis action movie high and after all, Kurt deserved to plan some of their time together. How bad could it be?

He'd felt quite confident until he walked into Kurt's room the next night and seen what he had referred to as "that green crap". He'd run when Kurt had tried to apply it to his face. And then he'd laughed out loud when Kurt had asked him what he would prefer, high lights or low lights. (Well, he'd laughed after figuring out what the hell highlighst and low lights were)

It had taken him two days, 1 box of Godiva chocolates, and giving up his ratty blue comforter in exchange for a white and silver.._good lord, white and silver_.. bedspread to earn Kurt's forgiveness. They'd also had a long talk about the importance of being emotionally supportive of each other.

Dave now did not laugh when Kurt asked him if he'd watched Oprah.

Kurt didn't laugh when Dave asked him what he thought of the Daytona 500 results.

Storing those memories in his heart, as he did with all of his memories of Kurt, he focused on what his boyfriend was saying.

Cheeks pink and biting his lip, Kurt wouldn't meet his eyes, mumbling

"Well, I won't be nervous to sing my solo because..because.." brushing his tearing eyes impatiently, he continued "I'll be singing it to you"

And in that moment, all the world fell away. It was just the two of them.

Dave brushed back his own tears and pulled his boyfriend in for a crushing hug, running his large, callused hands over his back and hair. He could feel the smaller boy shaking in his arms.

Pulling back, Dave tilted up the other boys face, smoothing away the traces of tears.

"I love you so much it scares me. Promise me that we'll always be together"

Settling back into his boyfriend's arms, Kurt smiled.

"I promise"

REGIONALS

The competition had gone surprisingly well.

Aural Intensity had sung three Taylor Swift songs with reasonable skill. But there hadn't been that spark.

Dalton Academy, who Kurt had insisted on cheering on through every song, had sung a Pink party anthem, a Frank Sinatra classic and then pretty boy (which is still how a slightly jealous Dave thought of Blaine) had sung Breakeven, by the Script.

They deserved the rousing standing ovation that Kurt and the rest of the audience had given them.

McKinley had gone last. Singing two original songs had been a risk, but after the thundering applause, they felt validated in their choice to think outside of the box.

Kurt's solo was saved for last. A sort of 'close the house down' thing.

Dave had held his breath backstage, gripping hands with his fellow glee clubbers, and prayed for Kurt to nail it. Seeing his parents and his football friends in the audience, he had been relieved to see that they looked as captivated as the rest of the audience members.

One more step towards his plan to come out. They had accepted Kurt (as a friend, but still), now they were accepting Glee club,

Dave felt a little giddy; a strange sensation for the footballer, but he couldn't help but feel like it was all going to work out somehow.

Just then the strains of music swelled and he could heart Kurt's trembling voice intone the first few words..

_Well I heard there was a secret chord that DAVID played,_

_And it pleased the Lord_

_But you don't really care for music, do ya?_

Karofsky didn't miss his slight emphasis on the name David. He was lucky the dim lighting of backstage was there to camouflage his blush.

Kurt was flawless. His confidence rose with every note and when he went completely acapella for the last verse, Dave found himself as enraptured as the audience.

As the last notes died away, the audience sat for a brief moment in the stunned silence that follows a masterful performance.

Then applause burst through the auditorium, louder and longer than at any other moment of that night.

Dave could see most of the women in the audience were reaching for tissues, drying their tear stained faces. His own mother was unashamedly crying, and his father stood next to her, applauding loudly and yelling "Go Kurt! Go McKinley!"

Trust his dad to cheer at a show choir event like it was a football game.

30 minutes of waiting, of agonizing speculation, of unbearable tension, and they were called back to the stage.

The announcer did his typical speel, and it felt like it would never end. Dave's heart was beating so fast he felt like he'd just run about 100 wind sprints.

Finally. The announcement.

"And in third place, with an excellent score…Aural Intensity!"

Dave and the other Glee kids jumped in excitement, and then quickly restrained themselves to cheer politely for their disappointed competition.

"and in second place..and this was close folks, Dalton Academy!"

Dalton Academy? Wait..did that mean? What did that mean?

"OH MY GOSH, WE WON!" Berry's ear splitting shriek broke Dave's reverie.

They had won! They were going to nationals!

The McKinley High Glee Club erupted. Grabbing the trophy, Berry jumped into Hudson's arms and smacked him with a big kiss. Looking momentarily stunned, Hudson shook his head, and then, to the delight of a cheering audience, he shrugged his shoulders and locked Rachel into a steamy embrace.

Friends and family began streaming up to the stage, joining in the cheering and hugging of each Glee member. Dave saw his parents and friends approaching, smiles stretched across each of their faces.

He'd never been so proud. Not when they had won the football championship. Not when he'd gotten an A- in biology. He felt amazing, like nothing could ever go wrong.

His parents were about 10 feet away when it happened.

"It" being Kurt.

Kurt didn't see them coming. Dave doubted he could see much out of his eyes, which were streaming with tears of joy.

"We did it, babe!" Throwing himself into Dave's arms, he locked his arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

Surfacing seconds later, he looked up to see the smiles gone from every single one of the faces that had, just moments before, been wreathed in joy.

_Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. _

Kurt; seeing the stricken expression on his boyfriend's face, swiveled around to see what had caught his attention.

Dave took that moment of Kurt loosening his hold on him to do the only thing he could think to do. The only way he knew to fix this.

Reaching for the slender shoulders of the smaller boy, he gave him a rough shove, sending him sprawling onto the floor.

"Stay away from me, fag"

Kurt's face changed quickly from confusion to shock. Not wanting to believe what had just happened, he reached his hand up to the larger boy.

"Dave, please"

Turning his back, Dave walked over to his parents and friends, still gaping in astonishment.

"Let's get out of here before any other homos try and kiss me"


	9. Chapter 9

**Well, I thought this would be the last chapter, but it's not! I need a full chapter to write the last scene. I have some work to do, (involving Hispanic outpatient therapy and lending someone my vacuum), but I will finish this story tonight! Thank you for reviewing it! And thanks for making me feel like I am not the only person on Earth who isn't a Klaine shipper! **

_My first kiss went a little like this._

_.and twist..and twist_

_In the back of the car  
On our way to the bar  
I got you on my lips  
(I got you on my lips)  
At the foot of the stairs  
With my fingers in your hair  
Baby, this is it_

Dave yanked off his iPod ear phones and threw the whole thing across the room. God! Was there a single song ever written that would not remind him of Kurt?

In the three weeks since Regionals, Dave had been in anguish. There were moments when it hurt to breathe.

Every song, every movie, every single damn thing reminded him of Kurt.

Wrapping himself up in that silver and white bedspread, putting on his newly acquired clothes, combing his hair, eating brownies, watching die hard, anything and everything was like salt on a fresh wound.

But what tormented Dave the most was not his own pain. He deserved to feel it. He was a fucking coward.

It was the pain he had caused the only person who he had ever loved. It was the knowledge that his Kurt was in pain that really made him sick to his stomach.

Following the tense ride home with his parents, he had hidden in his room all weekend. Well, he hadn't hidden really. He'd just shut himself in, refusing to talk to anyone.

His mom tried, his dad tried, they'd even called Mr. Shu and Coach Beiste.

Dave wouldn't budge. Because he knew that once he opened up and let himself feel, he was going to be in agony.

Almost like having a broken bone sticking out, that; until you looked at it, didn't hurt.

Dave didn't want to look.

He had existed in that precarious limbo, feeling nothing but crushing numbness until Sunday night. When his text alert (Still "somewhere" goddammit!) sounded.

A text from Kurt.

"I forgive you"

Those three words had broken through the wall Karofsky had erected around himself. The wall of protection those hours of his fathers yelling and his mother's pleading had been unable to breech.

Throwing his phone to the ground he rose to his feet, only to find them unable to hold him.

Collapsing to the floor of his room, he drew in deep, shaking breaths, trying so hard to stymie the flood of tears he felt building up behind his eyes. It was impossible.

Tears running pouring down his face, he shakily reached over for his ipod, situated in its dock. Flipping through the songs, blurred by his tears, he found the one he wanted. Clicking play, he let himself fall back to the floor. Curled up in a fetal position, rocking himself as he sobbed, he tried to shut out everything but the music.

_Well, I heard there was a secret chord that David played_

_And it pleased the lord.._

He listened to it on repeat track all Sunday night. Waking on the floor of his room on Monday morning, he pressed stop. And got ready for school.

Dave knew that school would be a nightmare on Monday. He had braced himself for anything. A scene. The Glee club turning on him with slushies. Getting his ass kicked by Hudson and Puckerman. Anything.

What he got was infinitely worse than that.

He got nothing.

No angry looks or shouted confrontations. No tearful scenes.

Each and every time he saw one of the Glee kids, they gave him a vague smile, and even sometimes an off hand greeting.

"Hey Dave"

"Hey Dave, see you in history"

"What's up, Karofsky?"

That had been mind boggling to Dave. He didn't understand. Why weren't they defending their friend? A part of him even began to get angry on Kurt's behalf. Shouldn't these people be looking out for one of their own?

Before he could become too consumed with confusion and anger he saw _him._ Leaving the cafeteria and walking down the hall in which Dave stood, obviously on the way to Glee Club.

He had been bracing himself all day for this moment.

Shuffling to one side, leaning up against his lockers, he watched, with wary eyes, as the smaller boy drew closer. Holding his breath, he waited, almost desperately eager for whatever was about to happen. For either condemnation or crying, at least he would get to communicate with Kurt again. At least he could begin to make things right.

What happened next stood out in Dave's mind, from that day forward, as the most painful experience of his life.

Kurt; drawing to a stop, peered up at Dave through his fathomless blue eyes.

"Hey Dave, I've got your trig notes. I'll slide them into your locker before the end of the day. "

And with a tight smile, he was gone.

And since that day; three weeks ago, Dave had existed in a black fog.

Food had no taste, school made no sense, and nothing interested him. Drinking, spending time with his football buddies, it was boring. He was surprised that they had never brought up the regionals incident. It's like they sensed it was too raw for Dave to talk about. Even brainless jocks could read the signals vibrating off of him.

None of it meant anything.

The world had lost all of its color.

Kurt was completely indifferent to him. Nothing he did or said seemed to impact the other boy.

He'd texted Kurt "I'm sorry" so many times, he couldn't begin to count. He hadn't gotten a single response. He tried to corner him to talk, but he was always with someone. The Glee Club had closed ranks around him, protecting him, and shutting Dave out.

Not with anger or hatred. That had always been his tool, as a bully. They shut him out with indifference, pity, and distance.

Dave had begun to feel like he had made up the few months he'd spent with Kurt in his head. He reviewed every moment they had spent together, every heartbreaking memory, trying to figure out if it had all been a game, or a fleeting high school romance, which he had read too much into.

He didn't understand how; no matter how much he'd hurt him, Kurt was able to turn off his feelings so completely.

Dave couldn't even keep his feelings under control, much less turn them off. After that brief period of numbness following Regionals, he had existed in a state of perpetual, crushing sadness.

Just tonight, his sister had made him watch Twilight, and; upon discovering who Bella and Edward were, he had cried.

He'd never seen his sister so freaked out.

Stumbling up to his room, he locked the door and fell across his bed. Reaching for the journal in his nightstand, he let the pictures fall all around him.

Kurt and him at the movies, holding hands.

Kurt and him kissing in the janitors closet near the choir room.

Kurt and him, lying under the stars out in the field behind Kurt's house.

Just like Bella and Edward. That is what Kurt had said. Every word he had every spoken was burned into Dave's brain. Every kiss lingered on his lips.

He hadn't changed the sheets on his bed for three damn weeks, because they still smelled like Kurt.

He arrived at school every day, with his hair completely tangled, hoping against hope that his outrage at seeing Dave so ill groomed would spark some kind of action in Kurt.

He'd even bought himself some new sweats and had worn them to school, with an old Simpson's shirt Kurt hadn't gotten rid of. It proudly displayed the phrase "eat my shorts, man"

No response.

Now here he was, crying over some damn movie.

He couldn't live like this anymore. Taking a deep breath and carefully collecting his pictures, he went downstairs. It was time he had a talk with his parents.


	10. Chapter 10

**Oh my gosh, y'all. I can't believe this story is over. I feel so sad and keep thinking that I've got to find some way to keep it going. The last two chapters have actually felt really rushed, like I should have made them into more chapters. I was jut anxious to take the story where I knew it was going. So, sorry for the rushed feeling and lack of detail. I actually would love to write about every day of their relationship, so look for new stories from me, and maybe this one, from Kurt's perspective. **

**Even if you've already reviewed, can you give me your review of the whole story? And please, please, please read the song lyrics. I am kinda guilty of skipping over them in other people's stories, but they are essential to the story here! Thanks for all the reviews, faves, etc. I love you all almost as much as I love Kurtofsky!**

The McKinley High talent competition was always packed.

For as long back as people could remember, it was the most attended non sport event every year in Lima, Ohio.

Maybe because it was so hard to get a spot in the show; only ten were awarded. And the competition for first place was so fierce.

Maybe it was the frequent controversy that erupted as a result of the performances. It seemed that no talent show could pass without some kind of incident.

Last year Sue had wrangled a spot for the cheerios and almost set the auditorium on fire with her unauthorized pyrotechnics.

The year before that Brittany had a 'wardrobe malfunction' during her dance routine.

The year before that, it was something else and the year before something else.

No one remembered when it had begun, only that they couldn't get enough. Drama and controversy were not thick on the ground in their frozen little corner of Ohio. The talent show was talked about year round and was the most exciting event to hit the north east corner of Lima in the frost bitten first week of March.

Dave shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He was having second thoughts about coming here to apologize to Kurt. Well, not second thoughts really. He _needed _to do this. His nerves were just getting the better of him, and he couldn't stop sweating. He hadn't been able to eat lunch or dinner, but that didn't stop him from feeling nauseous.

God, what if Kurt didn't forgive him? What if he looked right through him? What if.._shut_ _it, Karofsky_, he warned himself. Thinking like that would only make this harder.

He knew that the Glee club was performing. He had heard Hudson talking about it in the locker room. Something about a 'trial run for nationals'.

He knew that Kurt was going to be here. He knew that he couldn't leave without saying what he had come to say. Dave felt like a defendant in a criminal trial, asked to stand as the jury read their verdict.

There was no middle ground here. Either Kurt forgave him or he didn't. Either he had a second chance with the love of his life, or he spent the rest of his life in regret.

Dave would accept whatever the other boy decided. Kurt's happiness was the most important thing now. Even if that happiness meant he didn't want or need Dave.

The only thing Dave could concentrate on now were the words he needed to say.

THE TALENT SHOW

This year the acts were comparably tame compared to years past. There was no fire, no nudity, and no alcohol passed around the audience. (Oh yeah, that had happened one year too)

The Holson twins did their usual comedy act. It was their senior year, and their final performance drew the audience to their feet.

The cheerios had gotten a place again this year, and thrilled and titillated the audience with their rendition of "Hold it Against Me" the new Brittany Spears song.

But other than Sue Sylvester's bold choice in music, it looked like this year's talent show was not going to have its shining moment of controversy or excitement.

The Glee Club had performed an amazing rendition of the Beatles "Across the Universe", leaving a large part of the crowd wiping tears from their eyes.

It seemed that this year, the talent show had abandoned its sizzle and scandal, and set out to win the hearts of its audience, with sweet, funny and sentimental performances.

Now all that remained was the judging.

The Glee Club looked upon this as their first test for Nationals. If they couldn't beat out nine acts at their school talent show, they hadn't a hope of winning against over 50 other show choirs in the national competition.

They sat close together, on one of the front rows reserved for the performers, hands linked, awaiting Figgins ruling.

Figgins stepped up to the mike, drawing the collective gaze of the other thousand attendees.

"Attention, attention please. The judging has not commenced, as we have an 11th entry into our competition."

Shock waves rippled throughout the crowd.

An 11th entry?

There were only 10 on the program. And it wasn't like Figgins to break the rules. It had been only 10 acts for as long as they could all remember.

Clearing his throat uncomfortably, and asking repeatedly for silence, Figgins introduced the final act.

"Please welcome to the stage, Mr. David Karofsky"

To say that a stunned silence gripped the audience would be a gross understatement.

It was more of a paralyzed, shocked, disbelieving silence.

Dave Karofsky..performing in the talent show?

Hadn't he thrown a tomato at the freshmen group doing a mime routine the year before?

Nevertheless, it WAS Dave Karofsky who appeared from behind the curtain. It was Dave Karofsky who moved to the front center of the stage, dressed in corduroys and a button down shirt and tie, his hair neatly groomed.

Gripping an acoustic guitar under one arm, he looked anxiously over at the stage manager to the right hand of the orchestra pit and nodded.

Inhaling deeply, closing his eyes for a brief second, he stepped up to the mike.

"This one is for my sweet, delicious, ice creamed topped slice of pumpkin pie"

With this strange pronouncement, which no one but the Glee kids seemed to grasp, the lights dimmed.

The stage behind Dave abruptly filled with a black and white image. It was a quote, blown up enough to be visible to the entire auditorium.

The audience unabashedly strained closer, trying to scan the words, as soft familiar music filled the auditorium.

_I shall forget, to have thee still stand there_

_Remembering how I love thy company_

_And I'll still stay, to have thee still forget_

_Forgetting any other home but this_

_Romeo and Juliet_

_Shakespeare_

Every eye was on Dave. He'd never been the recipient of such concentrated attention by anyone, much less a thousand someones.

Paradoxically, rather than increasing his nervousness, his fear fell away.

It was impossible to tell from the auditorium, but as every eye was trained on him, Dave's eyes were locked with the frozen blue gaze that stared back at him in shock from the front row. Leaning into the mike, strumming the stripped down chords on his guitar, he sang these words directly to his beloved.

_A strangled smile fell from your face__  
__It kills me that I hurt you this way__  
__The worst part is that I didn't even know__  
__Now there's a million reasons for you to go__  
__But if you can find a reason to stay_

Just as Dave hit the chorus, the quote faded from the background screen. In its place was a picture. It too was blown up big enough for the whole auditorium to see. It was him and Kurt, sprawled out in Kurt's backyard, wrapped in each others arms.

Suddenly the words of the chorus resounded with meaning for the dazed boy sitting in the front row. Dave sang them with a pleasant, husky bass, infusing each note with bittersweet longing.

_I'll do whatever it takes__  
__To turn this around__  
__I know what's at stake__  
__I know that I've let you down__  
__And if you give me a chance__  
__Believe that I can change__  
__I'll keep us together whatever it takes_

Shocked ripples were working their way quickly through the audience. The picture on the screen changed again. It was him and Kurt again, this time kissing, snuggled on the couch for movie night.

It was impossible to ignore the rumblings of the crowded auditorium. Some reacted loudly, voicing their disgust. Others clapped preemptively. Some of Dave's football friends put their heads down, cheeks flaming with embarrassment for their friend.

Dave didn't see or hear any it, his eyes focused only on his Kurt, whose head was bent. The fact that he hadn't walked out yet gave him the bravery he needed to keep singing

Taking some creative license with the lyrics he sang  
_  
__You said "If we're gonna make this work__  
__You gotta let me inside even though it hurts__  
__Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"__  
__You said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be__  
__You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"___

_I'll do whatever it takes__  
__To turn this around__  
__I know what's at stake__  
__I know that I've let you down__  
__And if you give me a chance__  
__And give me a break_

Voice breaking on the next lyrics, Dave put all of his heart and soul into the huskily intoned words .These were the words he needed Kurt to hear.If he heard nothing else, if he never forgave him, Dave needed him to hear these words. He felt them so strongly, so deeply, it was as if they were engraved upon his heart.

___I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better___

_But remember the time I told you the way that I felt__  
__That I'd be lost without you and never find myself__  
__Let's hold onto each other above everything else__  
__Start over, start over__  
_

The pictures were changing every few seconds now. From Kurt and Dave laughing over Burt's burned dinner, to Kurt and Dave slow dancing in Kurt's bedroom, to Kurt and Dave falling asleep in Dave's bed.

___I'll do whatever it takes__  
__To turn this around__  
__I know what's at stake__  
__I know I've let you down__  
__And if you give me a chance__  
__and believe that I can change__  
__I'll keep us together whatever it takes_

The last drawn out note came to a close, and the screen paused on the last picture. It was Dave and Kurt, lying under the stars. Eyes mostly closed, arms wrapped around each other, Kurt had only been able to raise the camera enough to get a hint of the star strewn sky and the expression on their faces.

No one in that auditorium, not matter their beliefs, reactions, or feelings, could deny what was written on the faces of those two boys.

Love.

Oblivious to the steady swelling of audience reaction, Dave abandoned his guitar, jogging down the side steps of the stage, half walking, half running to the front row.

Reaching Kurt's seat, he saw that his head was still bowed, his small frame shaking.

Overcome with fear, apprehension, and pain, Dave kneeled down and blurted out the first thing that he could think of.

"I'm sorry I wore sneakers with this outfit. I couldn't find my loafers"

_Idiot_! Karofsky couldn't believe he'd just come out to his entire community, sang a love song to a boy in front of everyone he knew, and was now kneeling in front of him, talking about…_sneakers?_

No wonder Kurt wouldn't look at him. He was probably just as appalled at his stupidity.

_Had he really think a little song could make up for how he'd hurt Kurt? _

Some things can't be unspoken or undone.

Turning to leave, he almost didn't feel it. He almost got to his feet and walked away.

But he did feel like. The brush of a smooth hand against his.

Looking steadily into the downcast face of the love of his life, Dave waited, his heart twisting in misery.

Drawing a deep breath, Kurt slowly raised his face.

Dave drew in a shocked breath. Kurt's face, which he kept pristine with the application of dozens of skin care products, looked ravaged.

Tears were pouring down his face and his lips were twisted into a grimace of pain. His cheeks were flushed beyond their usual pale pink, to a deep, burning red.

The small hand that had stopped Dave from leaving was shaking. Drawing another painful breath he spoke,

"I.I've missed you so much, I almost couldn't bare it. I can't fall asleep without you. I love you, and I need you, I forgive you and I feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. And I am going to burn those sneakers, I don't know how they escaped my notice."

Taking a deep shuddering breath, he seemed incapable of further speech.

Dave was stunned. He had never expected Kurt to still love him. He had hoped..no, prayed even, for forgiveness. Getting his boyfriend back had really always seemed way beyond the realm of possibility.

Wiping away his own tears, he felt Kurt grasp his hand.

It was all the invitation Dave needed.

In front of the half delighted, half outraged view of the Glee Clubbers, Dave reached around the smaller boy's body, gathering him up and pulling him into his arms. Gazing into the red, swollen eyes of boyfriend, he knew that he had never seen anything more beautiful. Running his hands through the perfectly styled hair, he leaned in and whispered "I love you so much. "

And then he kissed him.


End file.
